What do you call a Essex girl with half a brain?
Gifted!
What do you call a Essex girl with 2 brain cells?Pregnant
Why aren’t Essex girls good cattle herders?
Because they can’t even keep two calves together!
What did the Essex girl’s right leg say to the left leg?
Nothing. They’ve never met
Why do Essex girls wash their hair in the sink?
Because, that’s where you’re supposed to wash vegetables!
She’d just blow dried her hair
and she didn’t want it blown around too much
Why is a Essex girl like a turtle?
They both get fucked up when they’re on their back
What’s a Essex girl’s favourite nursery rhyme?
Hump-me Dump-me
What’s the difference between a Essex girl and a computer?
You only have to punch information into a computer once
Why don’t Essex girls eat pickles?
Because they can’t get their head in the jar
Why don’t Essex girls eat bananas?
They can’t find the zipper
or
They cant find the pull tab
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