What’s easier to make: a snowman or a snowwoman?
A snowwoman is easier to make, ’cause with a snowman you have to hollow out the head and use all that extra snow to make its bollocks.
What’s the difference between a Snowman and a Snowwoman?
Snowballs.
What’s the difference between a man and ET?
ET phoned home.
What do a clitoris, […]
Mar
22-07
Quickies
Posted in Men jokes, Women jokes
Mar
22-07
HOW TO SPEAK ABOUT WOMEN AND BE POLITICALLY CORRECT:
Posted in Men jokes, Women jokes
1. She is not a BABE or a CHICK - She is a BREASTED CITIZEN.
2. She is not EASY - She is HORIZONTALLY ACCESSIBLE.
3. She is not DUMB - She is a DETOUR OFF THE INFORMATION SUPERHIGHWAY.
4. She has not BEEN AROUND - She is A PREVIOUSLY ENJOYED COMPANION.
5. She is not an AIRHEAD - […]
Mar
22-07
Things It Takes a Long Time For Guys To Learn
Posted in Men jokes, Women jokes
1. Women will drive miles out of their way to avoid the possibility of getting lost using a shortcut.
2. Women don’t try as hard as men during sex; after all, they don’t fall asleep afterwards.
3. Women do NOT want an honest answer to the question, ‘How do I look?’
4. PMS stands for: Permissible Manslaughter. (Or […]
Mar
22-07
Woman’s dictionary
Posted in Men jokes, Women jokes
1. “Fine”
This is the word women use at the end of any argument when they feel they are right but can’t stand to hear you argue any longer. It means that you should shut up. (NEVER use “fine” to describe how she looks. This will cause you to have one of those arguments.)
2. […]
Mar
22-07
The genie
Posted in Women jokes
A woman was walking along the beach when she stumbled upon a Genie’s lamp.
She picked it up and rubbed it, and lo-and-behold a Genie appeared. The amazed woman asked if she got three wishes.
The Genie said, “Nope … due to inflation, constant downsizing, low wages in third-world countries, and fierce global competition, I can only […]
Mar
22-07
Question and answer
Posted in Women jokes
What do you call a Essex girl with half a brain?
Gifted!
What do you call a Essex girl with 2 brain cells?Pregnant
Why aren’t Essex girls good cattle herders?
Because they can’t even keep two calves together!
What did the Essex girl’s right leg say to the left leg?
Nothing. They’ve never met
Why do Essex girls wash their hair in […]
Mar
22-07
Boys and Girls
Posted in Men jokes, Women jokes
“Equal” is not always synonymous with “the same.” Men and women are created equal. But, boys and girls are not born the same.
1. You throw a little girl a ball, and it will hit her in the nose. You throw a little boy a ball, and he will try to catch it. Then it will […]
Mar
22-07
Post Christmas Diet
Posted in Women jokes
Twas the month after Christmas, and all through the house
Nothing would fit me, not even a blouse.
The cookies I’d nibbled, the eggnog I’d taste
At the holiday parties had gone to my waist.
When I got on the scales there arose such a number!
When I walked to the store (less a walk than a lumber).
I’d remember the […]
Mar
22-07
Women versus men
Posted in Men jokes, Women jokes
1. NAMES
If Laurie, Linda, Elizabeth and Barbara go out for lunch, they will call each other Laurie, Linda, Elizabeth and Barbara.
If Mark, Chris, Eric and Tom go out, they will affectionately refer to each other as Fat Boy, Godzilla, Peanut-Head and Scrappy.
2. EATING OUT
When the bill arrives, Mark, Chris, Eric and Tom will each throw […]
Mar
22-07
How many girls?
Posted in Women jokes
How many sorority girls does it take to change a light bulb?
Two, one to hold the Diet Pepsi, and one to call Daaaaddy.
or
7, one to change it and six to go out and buy Tab (or diet Coke).
or
65, 1 to do it and 64 to sing and clap.
or
One. She holds on to it and the […]
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