Two gas company servicemen, a senior training supervisor and a young trainee were out checking meters in a suburban neighborhood. They parked their truck at the end of the alley and worked their way to the other end. At the last house, a woman looking out her kitchen window watched the two men as they […]
Mar
20-07
Excessive skepticism
Posted in Stupid jokes
A guy and his dog go into a barroom. The bartender says, “Hey, get that dog out of here… we don’t allow dogs in here.”
Wait a minute, the guy says, “This is no ordinary dog ! This is ‘Plato’ the talking dog !”
“Yeah, sure” says the bartender.
I’ll prove it to you,” says […]
Mar
20-07
Pills
Posted in Stupid jokes
The man asked the doctor for birth control pills, and the doctor asked why he would need birth control. “To help me sleep better.” Birth control pills don’t help with insomnia, the doctor explained. “Yes they do,” the man insisted, “I put them in my daughter’s drink before she goes out and I sleep much […]
Mar
20-07
Historical joke
Posted in Stupid jokes
Where did King Arthur take his girl friend on a date?
To a nightclub [knight club]
Mar
20-07
Idiot
Posted in Stupid jokes
An idiot was taking sky-diving lessons. The instructor explained that it was time for his first jump, and all he had to do was jump from the plane, count to six, and pull the rip cord. A truck would be waiting for him in the field where he would land.
The man jumped from the plane […]
Mar
20-07
Cigarettes
Posted in Stupid jokes
A man was carpeting his living room, and once finished, he couldn’t find his pack of cigarettes. Then he saw the lump in the middle of the carpet. He decided he didn’t want to pull up the new carpet for one pack of smokes, so he took his hammer and pounded the lump flat. His […]
Mar
20-07
Scientific experiment
Posted in Stupid jokes
How can you drop an egg four feet without breaking it?
Drop it from five feet. It won’t break during the first four feet.
Mar
20-07
Man in the parc
Posted in Stupid jokes
Three old men were sitting in the park talking. A little girl was in front of them, playing with her dog and listening to them. The first old man said “whoomf.” The second looked at him and said, “No, it’s whooorf.” The third old guy said, “You’re both wrong. It’s whoompha.”
Mar
20-07
Double Negative
Posted in Stupid jokes
A linguistics professor was lecturing to his class one day. “In English,” he said, “a double negative forms a positive. In some languages though, such as Russian, a double negative is still a negative.
However,” he pointed out, “there is no language wherein a double positive can form a negative.”
A voice from the back of the […]
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